New Places

We've been touring through some ineresting places in Ohio and Kentucky the last few days. The locals have been very aware that we're not from around here, and this has been a bit of a puzzle. The theater last night appeared to be, other than the brand new hotel adjacent, the only building to have an occupancy certification in sight. The YMCA had curiously thick concrete walls and a permeable roof that required the treadmills to be spaced just so to allow buckets to catch the drips.

The more I've seen of the country, the more I am convinced that the personal auto's time has passed. The small towns are often all but abandoned. I'm not talking about the cities we've heard of on the east coast.

Starbucks has me pretty much on their side now. I almost don't care what they sell. They are distributing Joni Mitchell's new album, which sounds excellent, and are subtitling the display with some sort of protest themed statement. Though their restaurants are a far cry from the Italian coffee bars that inspired the CEOs, they maintain the overt idea of a place to meet and to discuss and exchange ideas. As I notice their equipment become even more fast-food (their blenders now have LCD displays that scroll "starbucks" and are presumably programmed to smooth their manufactured popsicle drinks uniformally across the world) their music collection has continued to engage me. I find myself drawn to buy a CD every time I go in. And what's more...I can look through the same 15 CDs in each starbucks, and hear the best tracks from each whether at a highway rest stop or a Bed Bath and Beyond Plaza. Here's a tip for their POS Entertainment Accessory Retailer handbook: allow the order-taker to see exactly what is playing on the In Store Mood Enhanced Audio Delivery System without leaving the Input Order Greeting Payment Kiosk. When I ask "what's this we're listening to," surely the idea behind putting the CDs within arms reach with editorialized signage is corrupted by the girl having to walk in the back to answer. Also, they now have a Sugar Syrup and Bulk Tea Storage/Display and Sales Enhancer case that allows the for-here cups (for my younger readers: this is a cup that your parents used to use that is hard to the touch and holds drinks (or pens!) for many days without getting soggy) to be displayed so that if I ask for one, I can point at what I want. This is actually necessary because in the middle of the country, the staff denies the existence of anything but paper cups. Long live the short! Also, to walk past abandoned buildings in the downtown of ashland, KY. Past the "Naughty but Nice" Lingerie shops and check cashing and Bob Evans' and Burger Kings, across acres of empty parking lot built for who-knows-what (oh wait, our show is sold out here...thank you Ashland...I know you'll have a place to park) into a store that sells maybe 50 retain items, 15 of which are CDs I would buy and 1 of which is a gleaming Acasso espresso machine for $849, is quite a thrill. I'm heading to Payday Express for an advance right now.

previously unpublished expose of Boston Globe Magazine

I’m writing to take issue with the tone and substance of Tom Keane’s perspective in Gray Shades of Green. His use of simplistic arguments to attack useful civic programs amounts to small-talk more fit to fill awkward silences at a company party than to be published in this magazine, on which I have come to rely for insightful stories about 13 year old fashion models and listings for cosmetic dentistry professionals. Over-use of resources by people deluded by the sheer size and weight of their purchasing power is a problem at least as serious as the stone-henge of a grill I've got going, which I'm quite confident could be straightened and juvenated by one of this magazine's dozen ads for surgical tooth bonding.

Wicked Waste Management

First of all, is anyone else picturing Geddy Lee singing "Defying Gravity" on the next Tony's? It would be good for everyone.

I was in Japan last month and there are striking differences how they manage waste vs. the US. I saw exactly zero public garbages in Tokyo, though consuming beverages in single-serve containers is now common. The message is compound: on one hand, anything you carry is YOUR responsibility to dispose of properly; on the other, don't create a lot of trash b/c it winds up in your pocket. All their trash is separated into combustible and non-combustible, often with a third bin for food waste. Though they may not recycle with any more functionality than in the US, the public is used to a system in which waste is treated with care and sensitivity...that is, they're sensitive to the fact that the 9-volt battery and paper coffee cup they hold in their hand go different places in the afterlife. Every Starbucks and Tully's Coffee offer for-here beverages in ceramic cups, which has become rare in my experience in the US.

There are vending machines that sell everything from bottled water to hot coffee in aluminum or PET containers. These machines are found everywhere, in every corner of every street and alley they can stuff them. There are recycling bins by each of the numerous vending machines with holes just big enough to fit the cans in which the proprietary beverages are sold. We tried to stuff our Venti caramel crap in there...it fits, but we shamed our country in the process. I was struck by my eventual discovery that the beverage companies themselves were collecting the contents of these bins! On top of the Suntory or Asahi delivery trucks there are little corrals (in the US, I've seen similar setups contain baby strollers or deer carcasses) and the guys just toss the clear plastic bags full of cans up there. Of course, the truth of this comment rests on my assumption that they were not just throwing these bags into the river on their way back to the bottling center.

Editor's note: portions of this post are also published on No Impact Man

Pop

As many of you may have guessed by my June gushing about John Mayer and The Police, we are no stranger to Pop.

We've encountered some performances recently that are worthy of note. Justin Timberlake gets one thumb down, saved from a second by whoever created his show distracting most of the world from the lack of tunefulness and interest in his recent songs. I liked the thing he did on the Super Bowl a few years ago, and when he was on SNL and sat at a Rhodes piano and sang a nice groovy song. I like his take on Michael Jackson style dancing, though. It's good. Britney Spears has likewise lost my adoration with her MTV performance last night. I don't understand it, at all.

On the upside, Avril Lavigne keeps my interest with the above performance that continues the line of breezy entertainment equally suited to an arena or a bar mitzvah. This song wastes no energy on the performer's ability to sing, nay, the schoolyard clap-n-stance hook would discourage a performer from all but the simplest delivery. In contrast to Gwen Stefani's cheerleader-inspired hit of a few years ago, Hollaback, whose serpentine playground hooks connote a rusty swingset and denote maladjusted combatant kids, Lavigne's girlfriend playfully paws at our sense of loyalty and attraction while remaining totally honest and direct. We're not staying tuned in for her ballads just yet (we think 1987 Whitney Houston has that covered, thanks), but think this song gets right to the heart of entertainment. Maybe we don't get out enough.